Bug Eyed VS2008 Guy Freaks Me Out

My minders and the other people who care for me have told me not to put this blog entry out.

They have told me that it is cruel and bilious. That it is just trash talk and hater-speak.

But I won't be silenced. I cannot be oppressed. The right to free speech is up there. Pretty high. At least 7 out of 10. So I shall share.

Here I go.

Where did they find this freak whose shows up in the VS2008 install? Who is he? What the hell happened to him?

I must have kicked off at least 10 VS2008 installs in the last few months -- and i keep getting more and more freaked out by this guy.

HIS FACE IS TOO SMALL FOR HIS HEAD! His eyes are beady. And they seem to follow your mouse cursor around the screen. Don't they!?

I really think he's an example of photoshop touch ups gone wrong.

If you draw a line from the centre of his chin to the tip of his crown, you'll see that his face is slightly off centre with his head.

While this could be a genuine congenital abnormality, I think it's the result of poor digital cosmetic surgery.

In their haste to air brush any blemishes out of this guy, they -- the marketing/design people at microsoft -- have removed his face and later pasted it back on, slightly out of place and a little bit too small.

To demonstrate this, I've drawn the apparent centre line of his head in green, and what I consider the true centre line in blue.

The biggest problem is that his face is simply smaller than it should be. So I've corrected the problem.

Here was my first attempt:

You'll agree he looks perfectly normal now.

And after a little lip and eye surgery I think he looks even better again. He could go onto bigger things, perhaps appearing in the install for Expression Blend, which I'm told has a much higher quality bar.

'don2' on Sat, 01 Dec 2007 02:16:01 GMT, sez:

Who the hell are you to be the judge of this guy's face??

That is a REAL person you are picking on. How would you feel if someone said those sorts of things about you. This is a person with feelings who can't help looking the way he looks?

I am not going to unsubscribe I am just bringing out a YELLOW CARD warning for now.

'David' on Sat, 01 Dec 2007 03:37:15 GMT, sez:

don2: this is called humor.

Leon asks here this valid question: why would any sane software company put a commercial-ish fake-smiley kind of photo on the installer of a technical tool?

'Oran' on Sat, 01 Dec 2007 04:24:20 GMT, sez:

I was thinking very similar thoughts as his face cycled past over and over again. It weirded me out, and my wife also commented on it. I think thousands of developers around the world are experiencing the same creepy feeling as they wait for their software to install.

http://www.rightreading.com/leftface-rightface/leftface-rightface1.htm

Maybe Microsoft is trying to subliminally communicate "If you use Visual Studio 2008, you too can have two left brains, just like this guy. You'll be a super-human coding _machine_!"

'Mark Cohen' on Sat, 01 Dec 2007 09:12:21 GMT, sez:

Seems the Christmas holidays got here just in time, I think you need a break ;)

'Josh Bush' on Sat, 01 Dec 2007 09:53:28 GMT, sez:

Hah! My co-workers and I had this same conversation but about the other guy in the setup. He had this awkward grin like he was doing something inappropriate. One of his hands wasn't visible in the picture. It makes you wonder what was REALLY going on in the photo shoot.

'Tom the Visual Studio Guy' on Sat, 01 Dec 2007 11:02:38 GMT, sez:

Hi Mr Bambrick

My name is Tom and I'm the guy you are poking fun of in the picture. It's not very nice of you Mr Bambrick.. I mean, take a look in the mirror buddy... you're no oil painting yourself. I've read you blog for a while and I always wondered (but was too polite to say anything...) why-oh-why your wife married you and how you came to get such a gorgeous little daughter, I'll never know. I guess IVF and sperm donors really do work.

As a little background, my Mother and Father lived underneath high voltage power lines when I was little and I think that may have something to do with the lack of size in my face. But the thing is there was a trade off... you see, other parts of me are really really huge.... I mean, you should see my feet.

Oh, and if you think my face looks weird, you should see my brother Terry. I'm the handsome one of the family.. he looks like he got hit with the ugly stick and then went back for seconds. So get some perspective please.

Anyway, I hope you will retract all the nasty things you said and realise that I am only human.. even if my beady eyes do make it look like I'm a gopher on speed.

Your grudgingly,

Tom

'lb' on Sat, 01 Dec 2007 18:48:45 GMT, sez:

@"Tom" -- hey, you have the same IP Address as someone who has commented on this blog in the past. Wow, what a coincidence, glen. ;-)

'rip evil k' on Sun, 02 Dec 2007 09:31:01 GMT, sez:

<script>
var Knievel = "alert('r.i.p');";
eval(Knievel);
</script>

'http://www.puls200.de/' on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 05:30:20 GMT, sez:

Ha! Excellent posting. You beat me to it. Well I think I'll do it anyway since it'll be in German :-) So I inserted the 2008 disk thinking nothing in particular when aiigh! this face pops out at me. Whoa what did I do wrong? And what's wrong with this software??

'Emad' on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 14:12:08 GMT, sez:

I don't know who this person is but he looks normal to me... And to be honest with you, he is probably an above average looking coder :)... He is either not a coder or an over-photoshopped-coder. Either way, he looks normal to me. But thanks to you, he is starting to freak me out.

'ben' on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 21:20:26 GMT, sez:

Poor guy.

I recognized (from a channel9 video) two of the photos from the vs2005 install as developers at microsoft.

I bet this guy is a developer too!

This post was funny but give the guy a break!

'lb' on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 21:23:07 GMT, sez:

@ben

hey i'm sure he is a developer and pretty normal looking in real life.

i really believe it's the photoshop people that have made him look slightly disturbing.

'tron' on Tue, 04 Dec 2007 10:34:07 GMT, sez:

I love you.

'Carl' on Tue, 04 Dec 2007 21:43:50 GMT, sez:

I had a very similar conversation with a colleague while we were waiting for the install to complete...

He seems a bit Picasso-esque to me.

The other guy that is on there is not a developer, he looks like he's modelling that cardigan/sweater for a catalogue.

And while we're at it, the woman on there has absolutely got to be a dental nurse.

I'd have more to say than this but MS decide to cycle the same images round and round - for the amount of time it takes, they could prolly showcase the entire studio development team on there!

'Jules' on Fri, 07 Dec 2007 01:22:33 GMT, sez:

Obviously having to reinstall the thing more than once would unhinge anyone.
I must admit that those 3 people in the install did creep me out a bit. I kept anticipating a new picture, but it kept cycling through just those three......
And yes, I did blame MTF....

'Dan F' on Mon, 17 Dec 2007 21:38:29 GMT, sez:

Damn you lb, damn you to hell. We've been installing VS2008 in the office and "that guy" is bugging *everyone* out now :-)

'g' on Thu, 17 Jan 2008 03:16:53 GMT, sez:

cruel too cruel

'Josh Stodola' on Sat, 02 Feb 2008 20:08:51 GMT, sez:

Where and why do they get these clowns for the Visual Studio setup screens? It's ridiculous. Who wants to look at idiots looking back at you? Seriously.

Proposal: Put Tetris on the screen instead of dumbass models.

'elJuan' on Wed, 09 Apr 2008 09:58:12 GMT, sez:

too funny! I agree 100% the bloke is a freak.hahahah

'scips' on Tue, 29 Apr 2008 19:02:05 GMT, sez:

I just created a group on facebook: "vs2008 freaking smiling guy".

I though I was the only one bugged by that man ...
But I am not...

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