Simple Trouble Shooting Application Now Fixes Everything
With Joe Cooney's help, we've constructed a simple checklist for trouble-shooting regular problems. Have you got any further items you regularly find yourself checking off? Please add more! - check the event log
- google it
- reboot
- run iisreset
- empty the recycle bin
- hit ctrl+break
- kill the aspnet worker process
- clear temporary internet files
- touch the config file
- degauss the monitor
- remove everything from the startup folder
- "get latest" and rebuild
- login as admin
- run ipconfig /renew
- check if capslock is on.
- run a virus scan
- download the latest CTP
- disable and then re-enable the network interface
- restart services (some/most/all)
- change your password
- unplug your router, and leave it unplugged for 10 seconds before plugging it back in
- clear your cookies
- add current site to your trusted zone
- disable javascript
- try to ping the server
- press 'clean solution' from the context menu in the solution explorer
- repair the installation
- run large magnets over all hard drives
- check the network cable
- defrag the hard drive
- try it in a different browser
- run a spyware scan
- minimize all windows and check for a modal dialog
- ensure configuration is correct
- see what has changed recently
- run process monitor
- run chkdsk /v
- revert all checkins from anyone named 'Gazza'
- run the windows update service
- remove and then recreate all Bluetooth partnerships
- do a hardware reset on your mobile device
- decompile + monkey punch + duck slap + donkey whack
- what would jesus do?
- look for suitable workarounds
- re-calibrate your Geiger counter
- check for packet storms
- best to rule out toxicological contamination early on
- describe the problem in terms even a child can understand
- apply duct tape
- increase the timeout duration
- increase the maximum threadpool size
- write to your local minister or government representative
- try using the Microsoft Online Crash Analysis to submit your crash dump bucket-id
- disable the customer experience improvement program
- eat liver of sacred monkey
- import the decryption certificate to the local client certificate store
- ensure sql server is setup for mixed mode authentication
- bypass proxy server for local addresses
- check the hosts file and the routing tables
- use filemon to locate any other log files being accessed
- check the bios
- update the device drivers for all peripherals
- attach a debugger, get a memory dump, look at it in a hex reader and post it to a forum
- cleanse all user inputs
- put a try catch around it
- replace the batteries in your wireless mouse and keyboard
- recompile all dll's
- uninstall the old version, re- install the new version, apply hot fixes patches and upgrades
- remove the case from your computer, and aim a fan at it
- check that you haven't been blacklisted
- run diagnostic checks on surge protection units
- add an index
- remove an index
- recalculate indexes
- ensure ftp uses passive mode
- recalculate statistics
- reboot in safe mode
- check kerberos delegation
- review query plan
- if 'automatically detect settings' is checked/unchecked, then uncheck/check it
- kill rogue processes in task manager
- run memtest.exe
- boot from your emergency repair disks
- follow standard knoppix data recovery procedures
- tweak-UI
- uninstall adobe pdf reader
- insert "Debug.WriteLine("up to line 53");" where appropriate
- set tracelevel to verbose
- flush buffers
- % truss -t \!all -t open a.out
- use cdb or windbg. add in SOS for clr issues.
- field test any lightning protection devices
- use a temperature gauge on all hardware components, and compare against safe operating limits from manufacturer
- run it inside a VM
- check the DPI.
- search the knowledge base
- enable javascript debugging
- turn off friendly http error messages in IE
- set the current culture to en-US
- attach a multi-meter
- roll back to your most recent backup
- check for GC pressure
- empty the MSI cache
- temporarily allow popups
- look in your spam folder
- recompile. wait. recompile.
- turn off windows firewall
- run caspol and give everything full trust
- put yourself in the shoes of the program itself. if you were the program, what would you do?
- ask hanselman
- try wireshark. failing that, try fiddler. what does tracert show?
- check the blueprints and read over the uml.
- implement the retry pattern.
- rtfm
- delete the bios
- attach anti-static wrist strap on every appendage
- sit inside a faraday cage
- insert "alert('here');" where appropriate
- overwrite every byte in memory the standard five times as pre-scribed by nsa guidelines
- reinstall the operating system from the original media provided by the supplier
- add a lock statement
- blame Irwin the intern
- blame the guy who left last week
- blame the ESL guy
- blame DNS
- add a sleep statement
- apply a fudge factor.
- run a spell checker over your code
- light some candles. sacrifice chicken.
- set all DWORD's to 0 in the registry. Then delete the registry
- drop all databases.
- unregister and re-register all dlls
- reboot 3 times
- drink own urine
- run prime95 overnight
- recompile the kernel
- do the packets hop subdomains, and if so does NAS require a NAS forwarding service -- how about VLAN?
- track down the original programmers who wrote the system, apply percussive trauma therapy.
- uninstall java
- underclock it
- ignore it
- post a request for comment on theDailyWTF
- ask for correlating evidence that the problem even exists
- sharpen your wooden stakes before proceeding any further
- melt silver crucifixes onto tips of all bullets
- fill your water bottle with holy water
- call tech support
- check when daylight savings begins
- simmer ground rhino horn on a bed of whale pancreas
- plan and enact your fire evacuation plan
- bathe in holy water
- increase dosage on all medications. check for interactions.
- bury heart of an ox at midnight under crossroads on fullmoon
- clean up your desk
- check that pump's suction pipe is elevated above bottom of pond. (Float the inlet 18 to 24 inches below the water surface)
- wear shoes with six inch cork soles
- wear raincoat, goggles, breathing apparatus
- climb into an anti static bag
- always use a condom
- check pressure reading on gauges number 1 and 2
- run it through an oscilloscope
- check your immunization schedule is up to date
- check for seismic/tectonic activity, solar flares, tsunami, meteor showers.
- go and get a coffee. come back and look at it with a fresh set of eyes.
Bender:
Just made my day :)
Kirk Jackson:
Great list! Did you get it from my ISP's tech support desk?
:)
Kirk
(URL: http://pageofwords.com
Shaun Austin:
And after trying all of that.... THEN and ONLY THEN, try asking on StackOverflow.com!!
(URL: http://
Nick Hodge:
0. Turn it off, and then turn it on
(URL: http://www.nickhodge.com/
Andrew:
An extension of 86: check if you're using ANY Adobe and/or Apple software on Windows. Uninstall.
(URL: http://
OJ:
update your drivers
turn on promiscuous mode for your NIC
set a system restore point
remote a system restore point
restore from a system restore point
rebase your VM
snapshot your VM
remove VMware and install VPC
disable RPC
add an IPv6 IP address
uninstall Google Chrome
write your own implementation in javascript
use more XML
refresh your web services
get latest
email usenet using the subject "HELP!!! URGENT!!"
join the freehackers union
uninstall all imperative language compilers
change your license key
edit your etc/hosts file
delete your side-by-side configuration
whack it in the GAC
run modprobe
and if none of that fixes the problem, it HAS to be a bug in the CLR...
.. or SQL server.
(URL: http://rant.blackapache.net/
aaaa:
run a search on google groups
(URL: http://
:
"Is it behind the sofa?"
(URL: http://
(again):
did you "view source"?
(URL: http://
Joseph Cooney:
#202: Open a port on your firewall
#203: Ask "what would Vader do?"
(URL: http://jcooney.net
osephCooney:
#262: Run in the WoW.
#263: add a directory to your PATH environment variable
#263: phone Long Zheng and set up a "taskforce"
#264: Try and create the most simple repro of the issue possible
#265: Call PSS
#266: Rebase your DLLs
#267: Ask a lisp weenie for help
(URL: http://jcooney.net
John:
You forgot one:
Let excess air out of your spare tire.
(URL: http://
a:
flip over the cover, and check for paper jams.
also, staples tend to get stuck in there a bit.
plus: wiggle the cables. wiggling is good.
Wiggling. Is. Good.
(URL: http://
noah:
You forgot "reverse the polarity of the neutron flow".
(URL: http://
hanna:
one point twenty one giga watts!
(URL: http://
DeltaTango:
Everytime it looks weird, it's a DNS problem anyway. :)
(URL: http://
Corey:
as long as you have properly degaused your monitor, all problems should go away :)
(URL: http://www.goldb.org
Jon Schneider:
Great list. :-) My additions:
- Close and reopen the browser
- Check that the HTML document has the proper !DOCTYPE tag
- Uninstall and reinstall the app
- Rebuild in Debug mode
- Rebuild in Release mode
- Check whether the classes were loaded by different class loaders (Java)
- Check for fusion bind errors in the - Temporary Internet Files folder (Windows Forms controls in IE)
- Leave the machine powered off for a few minutes before powering it back on (overheating issues)
- Disable add-ons (browser issues)
- Delete the user profile folder (Firefox)
- Put the laptop into Sleep mode and then wake it back up (fixes a surprising variety of hardware issues with my Lenovo Thinkpad T60)
And finally, that classic solution from outsourced tech support:
- Verify that the computer is plugged in
(URL: http://blog.jonschneider.com
Buck:
- Dance around server in grass skirt
- Sacrifice Mac Book in front of server (Microsoft Platforms Only!)
- Whisper to machine that you can take it apart but not neccessarily reassemble it.
(URL: http://
Simon:
Think about the problem just before I go to sleep, and see if I can work it out before morning. Works surprisingly often.
(URL: http://matchmatix.com
Reinhard:
In my opinion that list can not work, obviously "What would Chuck Norris do?" is missing...
(URL:
Darren Neimke:
* Is any antivirus software installed
(URL: http://neimke.spaces.live.com
Steven Nagy:
Cross the streams!
Make sure your computer is in fact not a brief case.
Ask Joseph Cooney a 100 questions about WPF
Ask Joel Pobar to add a new IL opcode to fix it
Ask Paul Stovell to redesign LINQ to fix it
Ask Chai's mum to come over for dinner
(URL:
lb:
thanks for the feedback guys. glad that snagy invoked chai's mum on this one. very helpful.
(am i an idiot for not knowing how to rebase my dll's?)
a few extra thing have occurred to me, some of which i feel utterly foolish for having overlooked earlier.
* DBCC checkdb
* apply a "!important" directive
* turn off disk indexing
* ctrl+Z
* disable extended stored procedures
* check that ram is seated correctly
* re-register MSXML 3.0
* check file associations
* html encode it and escape all apostrophes
* exec sys.dm_db_missing_index_columns
* type autoexec.bat | more
* Check what codec is used and download that sh*t.
* apply an offset
* use a box model hack
* exclude the folder from virus scans
* hop on one foot, facing mecca at dawn, chanting, while the wind is in the east
* "punch it, chewey!"
* clear paper jam
* PC Load Letter
* replace CMOS battery
* segfault?
* check that you haven't left a CD in a bootable drive, or a floppy in drive A:
* pick up the mouse. turn it over. lift it up to your mouth and speak in a very slow and clear voice: "Computer? Hello, Computer."
* cut the red wire
* reset client expectations.
* eject the disk and check that write protection is disabled.
* release the safety catch
* do all unit tests pass?
* is that 'no' for now or 'no' for ever? and if so, do you have a sister, or any hot friends?
* are you wearing your lucky cufflinks?
* DR ABC == danger, response, airway, breathing, circulation.
* clean the mouse pad. Take out the mouse ball and clean it too.
* Enable write caching (sheesh! moron!)
* remove the rom, blow on it, and put it back in
* call your cousin, the one who knows **everything** about computers, and don't let him go until he solves the problem.
* randomize, twice, before calling random.
* pray
* go to http://sadtrombone.com
so many options.
(URL: http://secretGeek.net
you all fail:
press escape.
(URL: http://
shazza:
ask clippy.
(URL: http://
HK-47:
First:
Do not use ALTER INDEX REBUILD to try to remove the differences between the stored and the computed view, because ALTER INDEX REBUILD does not recalculate the view before rebuilding the index.
Second:
Did you carry the one?
(URL: http://
lb:
@you all fail
ouch! nice observation.
How about F5 (refresh) -- and failing that, Ctrl-F5, hard refresh?
(URL: http://secretGeek.net
Jeffrey:
"Ours is not to right a wrong. Just mark it FAIL and move along."
(URL: http://
lb:
i think i might need to create a kind of simple program, "Quick, I have a problem, tell me 10 things I can do"
--and then we generate a random list of 10 responses, drawn from the 250 or so on this page.
Could sell it to help desks and make a killing.
Could use it as an interview technique.
(URL: http://secretGeek.net
lb:
#n+1: Check the message headers.
(URL: http://secretGeek.net
Dan F:
* Add ?cachebust=hellyes to the querystring
* flush your dns cache
* type it again really really slowly
* download it again
* call it a feature
* consult the magic 8-ball
* offer a sacrifice to $deity
(URL: http://
Wolf:
Check for Pulse.
(URL: http://www.wolfcat.com.au/randomrants
Will:
SET NOCOUNT ON
Ensure $annoying_person hasn't touched the server.
Ensure $annoying_person actually applied the patch as described in the painfully detailed deployment instructions.
(URL: http://
Steven Nagy:
* Add a captcha
* Pat head while rubbing belly
* Install timesnapper !
* Check FailBlog to see if the fail has occurred before
* Add #PRAGMA directives
* Tweet Scott Hanselman
* Format all text as 'currency'
* Replace code with a regular expression
* Replace regular expression with XSLT
(URL: http://stevennagy.spaces.live.com
Cyrious Garnetski:
Plug it in.
(URL: http://
F:
Take a shower...
(URL: http://
'NameField' on Mon, 22 Sep 2008 03:40:04 GMT, sez: commentField
'pusadolfo' on Mon, 22 Sep 2008 19:44:09 GMT, sez: *press the power button until it shuts down and start all over again
*ctrl + alt + del -> task manager and kill the process
*pray and wait
'Brad' on Mon, 22 Sep 2008 19:44:14 GMT, sez: perform an exorcism
'Oracler' on Tue, 23 Sep 2008 19:01:53 GMT, sez: Grant DBA permission
'Lars Wilhelmsen' on Thu, 25 Sep 2008 10:00:48 GMT, sez: Explain the problem to the coffee machine
'Scott' on Mon, 29 Sep 2008 18:49:33 GMT, sez: * 25 b. Try to ping from the server
* 25 c. Try to ping all the servers
* Try to ping the router(s)
* Try to ping the switch(es)
* nbtstat -R
* Insert head firmly in sand
* Ctrl+shift+Esc
* Drink mint tea
* Sigh loudly. Repeatedly.
* What would Dilbert do?
* Goto next most pressing task
* Resume most challenging existing problem
* Check for flashing lights
* Listen for alarming beeps
* Try another port
* whoami
* ipconfig /all
* ILO
* Does it work through a 3G card?
* Is the VPN connected?
* Are you working offline?
* Are you sure that's your phone?
* Is that an "O" (oh) or a "0" (zero)?
* Is that a "l" (ell), an "i" (eye), or a "1" (one) ?
* Did they say F/S, M/N, P/D/B ?
* Tomorrow is another day, unless your heart goes the same way as the server...
'Hugh' on Wed, 01 Oct 2008 00:50:05 GMT, sez: 165. remove all the references to .NET and IIS, and replace with PHP and Apache. Then there'll be no need for the rest of the list.
'Vaidy' on Wed, 01 Oct 2008 07:51:18 GMT, sez: Well, here is my small list:
1. Buy a brand new machine and try from the beginning.
2. Switch off the machine and try manually. (Who knows, it could be a human error... :D).
3. Blame it on Crude Oil Price Hikes.
4. Resolve economy slowdown first and then try again.
More to come...
'Coskun Aydinoglu' on Thu, 16 Oct 2008 12:36:17 GMT, sez: Edit SQL in query designer
Edit SQL in text again
'RT' on Mon, 27 Oct 2008 18:29:04 GMT, sez: Run: netsh int ip reset reset.log
'Drug Rehab Facility' on Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:59:26 GMT, sez: You must be real crazy to have thins kind of problems. Anyway, there are certain things that I would add too if I were to have this kind of activities.
ps: Cloney is my favourite actor. I love the way he plays his roles and the way he looks as a man. He is gorgeous.
'Frandsen' on Wed, 10 Dec 2008 13:19:34 GMT, sez: * WD40
* Shove it down with the brush and flush again.
'Tim Cotton' on Sun, 14 Dec 2008 06:30:02 GMT, sez: Check the gas gauge then Check the fuses
'Tim Cotton' on Sun, 14 Dec 2008 06:34:37 GMT, sez: Know when to call a profesional and usually don't hire the person that works for beer and especially don't give him/her the beer up front.
'Gabi' on Fri, 16 Jan 2009 09:58:09 GMT, sez: Refresh Desktop.
'mat roberts' on Wed, 21 Jan 2009 09:02:47 GMT, sez: Delete unused shortcuts from desktop.
Also I have never found uninstall adobe pdf reader to be helpful, but it is satisfying.
'Mile Technologies' on Sun, 24 May 2009 20:06:32 GMT, sez: notch the other side of the floppy and see if it fits now.
'Mile Technologies' on Sun, 24 May 2009 20:08:07 GMT, sez: check your DIPP chip for bent pins
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