secretGeek.net52 great reasons to fail at software
Subtitle: I just gave you 51 great excuses and you're still pushing that 'people' crap??
Earlier in the week I wrote "51 Core Abilities of Successful Software" in which i gave conclusive evidence that successful software is technically impossible.
Yesterday, Jeff Atwood posts "No Matter What They Tell You, It's a People Problem" giving a compelling and utterly convincing argument that ultimately the reason for failure is 'people'.
This argument always reminds me of the film, Soylent Green, in which it's ultimately revealed that the government is rationing out human flesh as the new staple diet:
[last lines]
Det. Thorn It's people. Soylent Green is made out of people. They're making our food out of people. Next thing they'll be breeding us like cattle for food. You've gotta tell them. You've gotta tell them!
Hatcher I promise, Tiger. I promise. I'll tell the exchange.
Det. Thorn You tell everybody. Listen to me, Hatcher. You've gotta tell them! Soylent Green is people! We've gotta stop them somehow!
And yes... I agree.. but the HR Weasel in me says "it's not people, it's personnel!"
[last lines]
Bruce It's personnel. Software is made out of personnel. They're making our code out of employees. Next thing they'll be breeding us like cubicle-cattle for off-shoring. You've gotta tell them. You've gotta tell them!
Jeff I promise, Bruce. I promise. I'll tell the internets.
Bruce You tell everybody at Digg. Listen to me, Jeff. You've gotta tell Del.Icio.us! Tell programming.reddit.com! Software is people! We've gotta stop them somehow!
And when you're a tiny little micro-isv, it's not personnel: it's personal. As in,
"This time, it's personal!" [1] But you know - I'm just adding Jeff's assertion to my own: so now there's 52 great reasons to fail at software.
Hey, I like that. I'll make it the heading and blog this crazy shit!
52 great reasons to fail at software
[1] what is the source of that tag-line? One of the rambo films? one of the Rockies? All of the rambo films and all of the rocky films?
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Mike Breen on January 11, 2008 06:06 sez:
The tag-line is from "Jaws: The Revenge" http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093300/
lb on January 11, 2008 06:09 sez:
thank you Mike.
that does make some sense, although when you think about it, Jaws (the original) was fairly personal. Chief Brody's manhood was on the line, as well as his role as a protector to his family, his sense of esteem with his wife, and his job, with the mayor.
So I think it could be safely argued that it was always personal in the case of the Jaws films.
kat on January 11, 2008 06:13 sez:
that's some bad hat harry
kat on January 11, 2008 06:13 sez:
Mike beat me to it, sorry
lb on January 11, 2008 06:15 sez:
@kat: I actually get what you're saying.
"that's some bad hat harry" is a quote from Jaws, [used by Bad Hat Harry productions, creators of the usual suspects]. So you was, lik,e subtlely 'tipping your hat' at Jaws.
Kees on January 11, 2008 06:28 sez:
Leela: This all must have something to do with the secret ingredient.
Fry: My God, what if the secret ingredient is people?
Leela: No, there's already a soda like that - Soylent Cola.
Fry: Oh. How is it?
Leela: It varies from person to person.
(and so it is with software)
Mike Breen on January 11, 2008 06:38 sez:
I always thought the tag-line meant it was personal for the shark.
Jet on January 11, 2008 06:42 sez:
@Mike, re: "personal for the shark"
i think that the plot suggests this is the case.
but knowing fish, i doubt it's plausible. and i doubt human audience are all that engrossed with fish feelings.
bring on the biting!!
Mike Woodhouse on January 11, 2008 07:38 sez:
According to IMDB, the Jaws tagline was "This time... It's personal."
Whereas this gem, of which I was hitherto ignorant, http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0482006/
, is rather closer, with "This time, it's personal..."
Tragically, this C$10,000 budget movie does not yet appear to have achieved a DVD release.
I'll get my coat...
astroboy on January 11, 2008 10:43 sez:
That tagline was probably used in all kinds of movies. Here's another : BRADDOCK: MISSING IN ACTION 3 :http://www.ruthlessreviews.com/reviews.cfm/id/1014/page/braddock__missing_in_action___.html
Picacodigos on January 12, 2008 00:50 sez:
I've personally always cherished a version of the same, a quote from "Die Hard" (a movie brimming full of quotable lines, as many of the 80's action flicks). The line comes from Alexander Godunov character, Karl (one of the bad-asses), just before he engages Bruce Willis on a slapfest:
"We're both professionals. This is personal."
You gotta love that! I've been tempted more than once to utter that line to some DBA or sysadmin I was having an argument with...
Farmer Jeb on January 13, 2008 16:30 sez:
Hmmm, even with my almost supernatural web-searching skills I cannot find a reference to the phrase "this time its personal" any earlier than 1987's "Jaws III". I would've thought it would go back further.
I had reason to quote Jaws just the other day when my one year old son, Eric, was playing in the bath - swamping his toy dinghy by dropping a toy whale into it; I said: "We're gonna need a bigger boat".
Ben on January 14, 2008 08:43 sez:
Haha. This is great! Thanks man!